Tag Archives: building self confidence

Building Self-Confidence Helps Build Healthy Relationships

Being in a relationship can (and should) boost your self-confidence, but that’s not always how it works for people entering a relationship with low or damaged self-esteem.

Self-Confidence and RelationshipsIf you go into a relationship with low self-confidence, first, you’re more likely to doubt anything positive your partner sees in you, and also, you’re more likely to choose  a partner who is negative – who also has a low self-esteem level – and who reinforces your negative self-perception.

According to Dr. Alice Boyes, poor self-esteem and a lack of self-confidence can cause low-quality relationships – with less love, less trust, more conflict, more ambivalence, and less stability.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”                                – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Why Building Self-Confidence Helps Build Healthy Relationships

“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.”   – e.e. cummings

Build Healthy Self-ConfidenceBuilding your self-confidence helps you build healthier relationships, and it’s kind of like the saying on airplanes for emergencies – about putting on your own oxygen mask first because you can’t help anyone else if you can’t breathe.

Can you be in a relationship if you lack self-confidence and have no sense of self-esteem? Of course! People do it every day – but the quality of your relationships will most likely suffer under the weight of the negativity you experience on  a personal level.

Simple Confidence Boosters

“If we all did the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.”   – Thomas Alva Edison

While others can do positive, confidence-boosting things for you, and you for them, no one can build someone else’s self-confidence – by it’s very definition, self-confidence is an internal, personal evaluation of self-worth.

You can do external things for a quick self-confidence boost, like getting you hair done, or working out, or putting on a new outfit, but don’t ignore the value of making internal changes, too, because they provide a longer-lasting confidence boost.

There are many ways to build a foundation of healthy self-esteem; for example: help someone else, make a list of things you are grateful for, make a list of things you are good at, write down small goals you can quickly achieve and check them off as you do them, learn something new, or do something you’ve always wanted to do.

It’s hard to build a healthy relationship on the foundation of an unhealthy self-image, but it’s so easy to take advantage of things you can do to be more confident.

Kick Low Self Esteem in the Butt

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.”

– Eleanor Roosevelt

The Self-Esteem Companion: Simple Exercises to Help You Challenge Your Inner Critic and Celebrate Your Personal Strengths: Beat Low Self Esteem
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Low self esteem is like an invisible bully you unleash on yourself.

To kick its butt – if you ever want to have peace – you have to recognize it and see the fear behind it.

Then you have to look inside yourself and see the good, and maybe accept that there’s some bad, and then just accept that the fear is unfounded.

Building Self Confidence to Defeat Low Self Esteem

One exercise I love for improving self esteem is writing a pleasure list.

Think about what makes you happy, and what makes you smile – then write these happy things down.

Examples are loved ones, pets, places you enjoy, hobbies or sports you like, your favorite flowers, or a favorite funny TV show.

Keep the list handy, so when you start to feel down or you’re having a day that makes you feel like your self esteem is nonexistent, you can pull out the list and reread it to bring your spirits up.

The Self-Esteem Workbook for Teens: Activities to Help You Build Confidence and Achieve Your Goals (Instant Help Book for Teens)
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If you’re fighting depression, it can be hard to think of things that make you happy, so in that case, add a couple things you do to help others to your list if it feels hard to think of anything that makes you smile.

Self empowerment and self confidence begin with removing, or strengthening, the parts that feel small and weak within yourself, so you can create a strong self image to use as a healthy foundation for building a healthier, happier future.

Five Inspiring Self Esteem Quotes

Rather than chat about my thoughts on building self confidence, for tonight’s post I just want to share these five inspiring quotes and a few words about why I love each of them. I hope you’ll find them to be great confidence booster, and that you’ll enjoy reading them as much as I did.

5 Self Esteem Quotes

“Self-trust is the first secret of success.”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Self Esteem Quotes
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 If you don’t believe you can do something, you won’t be able to. It’s believing in yourself and trusting your own inner knowledge that guides each of us to – or away from – personal success.

“Someone’s opinion of you does not  have to become your reality.”

– Les Brown

Does anyone really know you better than you know yourself? No one can know every thought, every nuance of character that slides through each of our minds, so no one else’s opinion of us really matters a bit. You know in your heart who you are, block out the voices of others that ring in your ears if they bring you negativity and false judgement.

“The man who does not value himself, cannot  value anyone or anything.”

– Ayn Rand

Don’t waste your life and your heart chasing after or waiting on someone who does not even love him or herself and who is incapable of loving you – if they don’t love themselves, they won’t ever truly love you – they are incapable. That also goes for you – if you want to be capable of loving someone else, recognize what is good ad lovable in yourself, and let it blossom before you draw someone else into a loveless relationship.

“Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you won’t do anything with it.”

– M. Scott Peck

Self Esteem Quotes
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Learn your worth – walk away from the TV or computer games, or whatever your “escape” thing is – and show yourself what you are capable of – learn what you – what your time is worth – then make a beautiful, positive impact on the world, because you owe it to yourself to do that.

“Disciplining yourself to do what you know is right and important, although difficult, is the high road to pride, self-esteem, and personal satisfaction.”

– Margaret Thatcher

It’s true – if you do the right thing even when it’s hard, it touches you to the core of your being, and that goes the opposite way too, though. If you do the wrong thing, it leaves a charred mark on your spirit that takes a long time to heal – if it ever does.

 

Building Self Confidence When Everything Is Against You

Pretty much everyone has something that makes them feel a little bit, or a lot, quivery and weak in the core of their being – some thing they’re afraid others will judge them harshly for – or make fun of them for – or that they feel is missing in themselves that makes them put themselves through a sense of loss and pain.

What Is Self Confidence?

Self Confidence: How to Develop Self Confidence
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Self confidence is being aware of and believing in yourself, your innate powers, and your abilities, both inborn and learned.

It is also not being afraid to speak up when you know the answer, or to ask a question when there’s something you don’t understand.

It’s knowing that no matter what anyone else thinks, or you might imagine they think, it’s irrelevant in comparison to your own knowledge of your self worth.

Finally, it is feeling okay about yourself – and if you have that, the world feels pretty great.

If you don’t have it, it’s time for you take some steps so you can, because it’s a game changer, in a good way, and THAT, is the whole reason for this site.

Building Self Confidence

Don’t expect self confidence to blossom like a rose overnight – (though I hope it will for you.)

For most people, especially if starting with a damaged self-esteem, it takes a series of successes to wake up a positive self image.

However, just like a house or a multi-million-dollar corporation isn’t built overnight, a great sense of self isn’t built overnight.

How to Build Confidence

Make a list of things that are positive about yourself and your life. If you’re really bummed and struggling, make a fake list. There’s nothing wrong with a fake it till you make it approach, especially when it comes to putting positive thoughts in your subconscious mind.

That’s why I suggest writing it down, in list form. You have to think it in order to write it, then you see your hands writing the words.

Then, put your positivity list where you can read it several times a day, especially when you first get up in the morning and right before bed, but the more times you read it each day, the better it’ll work.

How to Be More Confident

Self Confidence: How To Overcome Shyness, Worry And Boost Your Self-Esteem (Self Confidence, Self Esteem, How To Be Confident, How To Overcome Insecurity, How To Overcome Shyness)
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If you’re really struggling to boost your self esteem and self confidence, go out of your way to help someone else – whether it’s with something big or small, just do what you can, it has the same effect on your psyche regardless of what it is.

The act of helping someone else creates an almost unbelievably positive feeling, so make sure you add it to your list so you can recall the deed and the feeling at any time by simply reviewing your list.

This works because if you are helping someone else, then you aren’t thinking about anything that’s bad in your life.

Two Great Self Confidence Quotes

“Nothing builds self esteem and self confidence like accomplishment.”

-Thomas Carlisle

“The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you.”

-William Jennings Bryan